Rajnikanth deadly stories

1. RECENTLY CHINA AIRPORTS WERE CLOSED DUE TO HEAVY FOG

........ LATER IT WAS DISCOVERED THAT RAJANIKANTH WAS SMOKING IN INDIA!!!!!!!!!!

2. RAJANIKANTH DID HIS KG FROM SEVEN DIFFERENT PLACES..TODAY THOSE PLACES ARE KNOWN AS IITS!!!!!!

3. GOVERNMENT OF INDIA PAYS TAX TO RAJANIKANTH FOR LIVING IN INDIA!!!!!!!

4. DEFINITION OF SOLAR ECLIPSE:

WHEN RAJANIKANTH STARES AT SUN WITH ANGER, SUN HIDES BEHIND THE MOON. THIS GREATEST PHENOMENA IS CALLED SOLAR ECLIPSE.........!!!!!

5. RAJANIKANTH WOKE UP ONE DAY AND DECIDED HE SHOULD SHARE ATLEAST ONE PERCENT OF HIS KNOWLEDGE WITH THE WORLD......

THUS....................... THE GOOGLE WAS BORN!!!!

6. THINK WHAT WOULD HAVE HAPPENED IF RAJANI WOULD HAVE BORN 150 YEARS AGO..?????

BRITISH WOULD HAVE FOUGHT FOR INDEPENDANCE....

7. BEST RAJANI JOKE!!!!!!   EVEN GHAJINI REMEMBERS RAJANI!!!!

8. AN EMAIL WAS SENT FROM MYSORE TO BANGALORE ....

RAJANIKANTH STOPPED IT AT MANDYA !!!

9. WHY DO EARTHQUAKE OCCURS?????

BECAUSE AT THAT TIME RAJANIKANTH'S MOBILE IS ON VIBRATION MODE!!!!!!!!!

10. ONCE RAJANIKANTH BUNKED A WHOLE DAY IN SCHOOL.....!

SINCE THEN THAT DAY IS KNOWN AS ..............................  SUNDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

11. THE PYRAMIDS IN EGYPT ARE ACTUALLY.................................

..........RAJANIKANTHS PRIMARY SCHOOL CRAFT PROJECTS!!!!!!!!!!!!

12. BREAKING NEWS : ISRO DOES NOT EXISTS ANYMORE.....!!

RAJANIKANTH PURCHASED ALL THE ROCKETS FOR DIWALI CELEBRATION!!!!!!!

13. WHY DID RAJANI BUY AN ACRE OF LAND WTH 4 WELLS ON EACH CORNER????? ....................... TO PLAY CARROM!!!!!!

14. BEFORE TOM CRUISE, RAJANI WAS APPROACHED FOR THE MOVIE MISSION IMPOSSIBLE, BUT RAJANI REFUSED AS HE FOUND THE TITLE INSULTING..

15. RAJNIKANTH'S NEXT PROJECT. TITANIC IN TAMIL. CLIMAX REVISED. BOTH SURVIVE. RAJNIKANT SWIMS ACROSS THE ATLANTIC OCEAN WITH HEROINE IN ONE HAND AND... TITANIC IN THE OTHER.

The Ultimate Top 25 Chuck Norris “The Programmer” Jokes

1. When Chuck Norris throws exceptions, it’s across the room.

2. All arrays Chuck Norris declares are of infinite size, because Chuck Norris knows no bounds.

3. Chuck Norris doesn’t have disk latency because the hard drive knows to hurry the hell up.

4. Chuck Norris writes code that optimizes itself.

5. Chuck Norris can’t test for equality because he has no equal.

6. Chuck Norris doesn’t need garbage collection because he doesn’t call .Dispose(), he calls .DropKick().

7. Chuck Norris’s first program was kill -9.

8. Chuck Norris burst the dot com bubble.

9. All browsers support the hex definitions #chuck and #norris for the colors black and blue.

10. MySpace actually isn’t your space, it’s Chuck’s (he just lets you use it).

11. Chuck Norris can write infinite recursion functions…and have them return.

12. Chuck Norris can solve the Towers of Hanoi in one move.

13. The only pattern Chuck Norris knows is God Object.

14. Chuck Norris finished World of Warcraft.

15. Project managers never ask Chuck Norris for estimations…ever.

16. Chuck Norris doesn’t use web standards as the web will conform to him.

17. “It works on my machine” always holds true for Chuck Norris.

18. Whiteboards are white because Chuck Norris scared them that way.

19. Chuck Norris doesn’t do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts.

20. Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.

21. Chuck Norris’s beard can type 140 wpm.

22. Chuck Norris can unit test entire applications with a single assert.

23. Chuck Norris doesn’t bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing.

24. Chuck Norris’s keyboard doesn’t have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris.

25. When Chuck Norris is web surfing websites get the message “Warning: Internet Explorer has deemed this user to be malicious or dangerous. Proceed?”.

Aao hasein ...

Sardar's Son - Papa jaldi-2 mera viya kra deo nahi ta main DAADI nal viya
kra lavanga.
Sardar:oye tu meri MAA nal viya krayenga.!
Son:-kyo tusi meri MAA nal ni krayea..

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Santa talking on cell.
Banta: kis se baat kar raho ho. Santa: biwi se.....
Banta: itne... pyar se....?
Santa: tumhari hai. . .!!!

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Accha agar kisi ke birth certificate mein Date of Birth nahin hai ....
batao uska kya naam hai ..
batao .. batao ...

nahin pata ...
aree yaar ..
Umar-Gul ..... ha ha ha ..

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Pizza aur dil main badiya kaun .....
areee pizza yaar ...
why ??....
areeee pizza ke tukde hote hain to pet bharta hai ..
aur dil ke tukde hote hain to ashique marta hai .. ha ha ha ..